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[P]
diamonds aren't my girl's best friend

By makohill in makohill's Diary
Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:29:28 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

I'm not a big fan of diamond jewelery. The stories of artificial scarcity, the stories of horrible working conditions in the mines, the stories of massive rich manipulative organizations at the helm of the industry: all checks against the stones.

Additionally, I'm really not a fan of engagement rings. They seem to be both a sign of conspicuous consumption and a sign of ownership codependencey and control: a more expensive sophisticated hickey or high school letter jacket.

And sure, I understand that for most people, the ring is about a sign of love: "He loves me enough to spend lots of money on this ring." However, I find this lack of critical perspective to be an extremely unattractive, even incompatible trait in a girl.

If I proposed to a woman and she asked for a ring, not only would not go out and buy her a ring, I think I would retract the engagement on the spot. I just can't imagine happily spending the rest of my life with someone who could want a diamond engagement ring.

Talk about a request backfiring.

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diamonds aren't my girl's best friend | 14 comments (14 topical, editorial, 0 hidden)
Two words.... (5.00 / 3) (#1)
by lb008d on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:31:28 PM EST

Extended Copy

not to mention... (5.00 / 1) (#2)
by jcw2112 on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:35:10 PM EST

...that most of the diamonds that are mined in the world today come from mines where workers are exploited to a degree that would make your stomach churn. it's practically slavery. i take that back, it is slavery.

pick up derrick jensen's the culture of make believe some time. it's a painful read, but it made us regret that diamond she got.

coulda saved me some serious cash too.



____________________
suck. on. it.

Yup (5.00 / 1) (#13)
by lb008d on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 04:22:16 PM EST

Plus, remember that if it weren't for the DeBeers monopoly, diamonds would be practically worthless.

[ Parent ]
AGREED (5.00 / 7) (#3)
by DesiredUsername on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:36:41 PM EST

THIS UNIT ALSO CANNOT SEE THE LOGIC OF THIS "ENGAGEMENT" CEREMONY. ON PREVIOUS ENCOUNTERS WITH FEMALE UNITS THIS UNIT HAS OUTPUTTED A PROPOSAL THAT MAYBE WE SHOULD SLEEP AROUND BECAUSE SEX != LOVE BUT THIS PROPOSAL HAS MET WITH IRRATIONAL DISFAVOR. SOMEDAY THIS UNIT WILL MEET A FEMALE UNIT HAS LOGICAL, SELF-CONSISTENT AND UNEMOTIONAL AS ITSELF.

END TRANSMISSION.

Play 囲碁

DISAGREED (5.00 / 1) (#5)
by makohill on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:55:48 PM EST

You are confusing logic, self-consistency, and unemotional behavior with critical perspective--a distinction I made in my post.

I am into attractive, passionate, inconsistent, often irrational and very human women. Just not he ones that go out of their way to remain oblivous or uncritical about the world around them.

If you think that's an unreasonable position for me to take, its fine with me. If you think I'm limiting my options, you're correct. But thank me, don't mock me. You've got less competition for the oblivous, shallow, and otherswise uncritical women out there.


Creativity can be a social contribution, but only in so far as society is free to use the results. --RMS
[ Parent ]
You should check out (5.00 / 1) (#7)
by Skywise on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 02:03:24 PM EST

the movie "Free Enterprise" sometime... there's a scene in there that agrees with you completely that I think you'll appreciate.

[ Parent ]
I confuse nothing (5.00 / 2) (#8)
by DesiredUsername on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 02:12:24 PM EST

I'm married without benefit of engagement ring, partly for the reasons you state. But my wife still likes diamonds because they are pretty.

You seem to be saying that diamonds occupy a special place where no one is allowed to be irrational (like people who enjoy diamonds even knowing something about the industry problems) without being called "uncritical". Are you planning to find a girl that drives a gas-powered car? What about smoking? Will she have more than 1% body fat? Will she patronize the RIAA/MPAA for entertainment?

My point is you should be looking for someone you love and who loves you. Rejecting someone who doesn't share your PC fad view of the moment is just as dumb and superficial as refusing to date "fatties".

Play 囲碁
[ Parent ]

Cubic zirconium is also pretty. (nt) (5.00 / 1) (#9)
by spcmanspiff on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 02:39:38 PM EST



[ Parent ]
cubic zirconium (5.00 / 1) (#11)
by makohill on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 02:42:37 PM EST

Personally, I don't think diamonds are all that pretty. That said, I think cubic zirconium is just as pretty as diamond. :)


Creativity can be a social contribution, but only in so far as society is free to use the results. --RMS
[ Parent ]
c'mon (5.00 / 1) (#10)
by makohill on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 02:40:47 PM EST

You seem to be saying that diamonds occupy a special place where no one is allowed to be irrational (like people who enjoy diamonds even knowing something about the industry problems) without being called "uncritical".

I'm not saying that. I'm just staying that I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with a woman who is uncritical, or oblivious uninformed in this way.

It's not about sharing an exact political ideology and it's not about a PC fad. Comparing this to not dating fatties is prima facie ridiculous. It's about taking the steps necessary to connect your desire for a diamond, which is not in and of itself wrong, to the context that creates them.

People often don't make this type connection not because the information is not available but because they don't want to. If she really has never heard about the problems with the diamond industry, that's worrisome but forgivable.

It's the people who know the context in which the image of a dimaond is manufactured and sold and find it easier to ignore it than modify their own behavior that I personally find unattractive and romantically incompatible. They may be fine people but they are definately not girlfriend or wife material in my case.


Creativity can be a social contribution, but only in so far as society is free to use the results. --RMS
[ Parent ]
well (5.00 / 3) (#12)
by tps12 on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 04:08:07 PM EST

What about a girl who likes McDonald's food, even though she knows it's unhealthy and overpriced, and that the cows are treated even worse than is normal for the beef industry? Or prefers a certain brand of designer underwear, though she knows it's made in sweatshops and that she's paying a huge markup for the brand name?

Consumer culture is rife with examples of irrational behavior like this, as DU tried to point out above. I can't help but think that you're giving extra attention to the diamond issue because of the expense involved.

[ Parent ]

well sure (5.00 / 1) (#14)
by makohill on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 09:38:09 PM EST

What about a girl who likes McDonald's food, even though she knows it's unhealthy and overpriced, and that the cows are treated even worse than is normal for the beef industry? Or prefers a certain brand of designer underwear, though she knows it's made in sweatshops and that she's paying a huge markup for the brand name?

In fact, the type or girls I date are not the type that eat McDonalds, or even meat, and usually don't make a habbit of shopping at WalMart or wearing Nikes.

I'm giving extra attention to the diamond issue in this particular case because I thought the whole "ask for an engagement ring, get dumped" scenario was a suprising, perhaps even informative and humorous image that highlighted a larger issue and made for concise little diary entry.


Creativity can be a social contribution, but only in so far as society is free to use the results. --RMS
[ Parent ]
my future ring (5.00 / 1) (#4)
by StackyMcRacky on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:47:29 PM EST

we're going with a ring....i'm not sure why but we are. anyway, we've decided that i will wear my grandmother's ring that was given to me when she died. he's going to get it cleaned up and resized for me. we're both very happy with this decision.
ah, the best of both worlds n/t (5.00 / 1) (#6)
by makohill on Tue Feb 18, 2003 at 01:57:46 PM EST


Creativity can be a social contribution, but only in so far as society is free to use the results. --RMS
[ Parent ]
diamonds aren't my girl's best friend | 14 comments (14 topical, 0 editorial, 0 hidden)
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